Conversations with Rexy: I Want To Peel Your Skin Off

My friend Rexy is so funny, I had to give her a blog category of her own. She has graduated from "Shit Women Say To Me."

The following conversation took place in bed:

Rexy: I want to take a box-cutter, peel your skin off and take it home with me.

Me: Um... why?

Rexy: Because I love the way your skin feels.

Me: Wow, most girls would have just said, "I love the way your skin feels." But you led with the whole "box-cutter thing," because you're unique.

Twelve hours later, via text message:

Me: Have you seen the movie May? It made me think of you. I think you'll love it. We have to watch this movie together!

Rexy: Never seen it. What's it about?

Me: It's about a mentally disturbed woman whose best friend is a doll. It's the creepiest God-damned shit I've ever seen.

Rexy:  I think I may be insulted now.

Me: Just trust me.

Rexy: Just watched the trailer for May. Two things: I'm bringing a scalpel when we watch it and you'd better bring a good explanination and/or bribe.